She is scared,
and keep her self in defense mode.
She builds a big giant wall around her,
it’s made from glasses.
She can watch the world.
She wants to know everything and everyone.
she is still scared of the fact that something,
could hurt her.
she keep her self in defense mode.
“But you don’t look sick?”
If you’ve battled Lyme disease (or any other chronic and/or neurological illness) for a small amount of time you’ve probably heard this phrase posed to you by doctors, family, friends, and strangers a number of times. And my guess is you’re pretty sick of it by now. Yeah, I know the feeling. It’s so funny that no matter who I talk to this always comes up. It’s also funny that when I talk to other “Lymies”, this topic is always mentioned somewhere in our conversation…and it is spoken of with great agitation.
It’s frustrating because as a chronically ill person who’s battled an “invisible illness” for a long period of time you don’t exactly know what to say when someone comments, “Oh but you look so good!” I know I should be glad that people think I look “so good” even after being sick for…
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I don’t care about whose DNA has recombined with whose. When everything goes to hell, the people who stand by you without flinching they are your family.
Please know that there are much better things in life than being lonely or liked or bitter or mean or self conscious. We are all full of shit. Go love someone just because, I know your heart may be badly bruised, or even the victim of numerous knifings but it will always heal even if you don’t want it to, it keeps going. There are the most fantastic, beautiful things and people out there, I promise. It’s up to you to find them.
Don’t ever mistake my silence for ignorance, my calmness for acceptance, or my kindness for weakness.
People don’t like love, they like that flittery flirty feeling. They don’t love love – love is sacrificial…
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Tied up in the lies, the failures, the wounds
Of this human life, I fail to escape
The evil clutches that want to consume
Me while I battle, beat-up, cut, and scraped.
Yet, You see something beyond all this mess,
Beyond the glaring errors that I make.
You find beauty in me, nevertheless,
Something worthy to You, not a mistake.
Through your life, death, and life, I awaken.
Freed by grace, I’m no longer forsaken.